The 2024 Selected Independent Annual Meeting featured several important funeral-related topics and discussions, but one specifically should be heard by every funeral professional.

Regional Sales Vice Presidents Kevin Gaffney and Jeff “Stewy” Stewart spoke on common disconnects between funeral homes and families. The two explained the impact these disconnects can have on your service and why you need to be aware of them.

Read below to learn more about Kevin and Stewy’s thoughts on these disconnects, this year’s Selected Independent Meeting, the challenges independent funeral homes face, and more.

What did you think of this year’s Selected Independent Annual Meeting?

Kevin: This year saw many funeral professionals bonding with friends and creating lasting memories throughout the week. Despite Hurricane Helene keeping us all on our toes, I noticed a lot of positive interactions and great engagement, which is always wonderful to see. Like past Selected Independent Annual Meetings, it was a time filled with excitement and connection for everyone involved. All of us from Funeral Directors Life hope everyone got back home safe, and our thoughts and prayers are with those impacted by the storm.

Stewy: It was an excellent opportunity to connect with some of the brightest thought leaders in the funeral profession. We had in-depth discussions about the latest trends shaping the market and how they impact our work. Together, we explored innovative ideas for improving the ways we serve families. The insights we gained were invaluable, sparking new strategies for future growth and service enhancement.

What are common disconnects between funeral professionals and families as outlined in your presentation?

Kevin: Our discussion at the Selected Independent Annual Meeting highlighted 5 common disconnects. The first three focused on families’ education and expectations regarding funerals.

Consumers don’t understand the funeral planning process as much as we think they do – Families simply don’t know what they don’t know, so ask them the right questions to determine if a family understands the details of funeral planning and try to educate your community as much as possible.

Consumers expect to pay more for cremation than funeral directors believe – Did you know that most families plan to pay more than $3,700 for cremation? We can’t assume that cremation families want the cheapest option.

Consumers expect to have a lot more time to work on funeral arrangements than funeral directors give them – Most funeral professionals think planning a funeral should take 3-5 days. However, families want more time to make arrangements, which could leave them feeling rushed or pressured by your funeral home if you’re unaware of this expectation.

Stewy: The last two disconnects covered families’ views of funeral homes and their ability to successfully use technology.

The overwhelming majority of consumers believe funerals and funeral homes are necessary and good – This disconnect is an unexpected positive for all funeral homes! Unlike some who don’t understand funeral homes’ value, many families believe funeral homes are necessary, valuable, and established on trust.

Families are much more tech-savvy than we give them credit for – Consumers in their 50s, 60s, 70s, and older, are willing to plan a funeral online, attend a funeral online, get online assistance with writing a eulogy, and more. Instead of assuming families don’t want to plan a funeral online, give families the ability to make all their arrangements online with the right tools.

Why do funeral professionals need to understand and avoid common disconnects when serving families?

Kevin: Funeral professionals are some of the most empathetic people in the world, but they can often struggle to connect with and understand families’ changing needs. This unintentional lack of understanding usually results in families experiencing unmet expectations and missed opportunities for funeral homes to serve families well. Assuming you know what families want or how they want things done can create dissatisfaction in your service. Ultimately, if the disconnect is large enough, the funeral home could lose the opportunity to serve the family forever. For example, many families don’t know all the options available for cremation, so the funeral home must take the time to explain those options.

Stewy: Building trust with families is extremely important, so we must always do everything possible to make a family feel like we’re here to make their hard time easier. We can do that by understanding what most families expect when they meet with us. If we don’t understand a family’s expectations when they meet with us, the result could be a dissatisfied or disappointed family and can cause unintentional harm. Any disconnect can erode trust, making the experience more stressful for the family.

What was the biggest takeaway you hope attendees received from your presentation?

Kevin: Getting feedback from families is extremely important for determining whether your service is causing unintentional dissatisfaction. Ask families for their honest opinion of you and how you cared for them. The results you get may surprise you, but it’s good to know where you stand. You also need to know the latest funeral consumer data, like how only 41% of people aged 35-69 have been involved in the funeral planning process or that most families believe they’ll have nearly two weeks to make funeral arrangements. The funeral professionals who seek out feedback and stay updated on funeral trends and statistics will have a bright future. Those unwilling to change face an uncertain future at best and a declining one at worst.

Stewy: We must realize that families’ funeral preferences will only continue to change, so it’s up to us to stay on top of the shift and understand families’ expectations. Funeral professionals must take the necessary time to see things from the families’ perspective. Just because we are convinced or have always heard that certain beliefs are fact doesn’t mean they are still true today. The good news is that awareness is the first step toward progress and can help you avoid unintentional dissatisfaction with families. Seek out education and information that offers insights into families’ changing needs so that your funeral home can be better prepared to serve future families.

What are some of the greatest challenges facing independent and family-owned funeral homes today, and how can they overcome these challenges?

Kevin: For generations, funeral homes have offered a unique service to their communities. While many factors have changed the funeral landscape, the care funeral professionals provide remains as important as ever. Some families may not see the value in funeral homes, but that can’t impact your determination to serve each family as best you can. Very few people can do what you do, so remember that your service to grieving families is irreplaceable. To win over families who doubt your effectiveness, you need courage and creativity to serve new families in new ways. Create exceptional and personalized experiences for families’ loved ones, and you’ll have more families speak fondly of you for years to come.

Stewy: Staying relevant can be challenging for any business and is especially true for funeral homes, which have to seek out new ways to meet families’ changing needs. However, funeral professionals are resilient and don’t back down from a challenge. One thing independent and family-owned funeral homes can focus on is having the right tools to connect with today’s funeral consumers. Families expect unique and personalized funerals, so make sure your funeral home is prepared to make that happen. As you explore new tools and services, do your research to ensure you’re choosing the right provider for your business.

What makes a provider the right choice for independent and family-owned funeral homes?

Kevin: For many funeral homes, the right provider will align with your goals and values. If your funeral home prioritizes personalized service and community relationships, then your provider should understand and support these ideas. Look for a partner who offers trusted insights and allows you to make informed decisions that are in the best interest of your business and the families you serve. When you work with a provider who feels like a partner, you’ll have a collaborative approach that strengthens your services. The right provider should put families and your funeral home first, guiding you with integrity and respect.

Stewy: The right provider for your independent and family-owned funeral home will allow you to focus on daily operations while supporting your long-term success. With proven experience, industry knowledge, and a deep understanding of the funeral profession, the right partner can offer valuable insights and strategies to help your funeral home stay competitive in your market. Their expertise in trends and best practices can bring fresh ideas that enhance your services. A commitment to innovation and technology is also crucial, which can help you adapt, meet families’ evolving needs, and achieve sustained success.

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For more than 40 years, Funeral Directors Life has helped funeral professionals grow their businesses, improve their service to families, and save time.

Fill out the form below to discover how a partnership with us can help you, your families, and your funeral home.

Want to learn more about common funeral disconnects?

We partnered with McKee Wallwork + Co. and Passare to create the New Funeral Consumer report to help funeral homes avoid disappointment and dissatisfaction in their service. This report examines families’ assumptions about funeral options, prices, timelines, technology, and more so you can best care for families and adapt to their changing needs.

Based on the report’s findings, here are 5 common funeral disconnects that can unintentionally hurt your service to families.