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Renewal -- Part 1: Finding Balance

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Autumn conjures up a variety of things...new school years, football, Thanksgiving, changing leaves, cooler weather. We say good bye to summer and, depending on where you live, think of the cold weather that is to come. Renewal is a word we associate with spring, not autumn, but is autumn not simply part of a cycle of renewal?

Several years ago a colleague introduced me to research in the area of work-life balance. We hear a lot about "balancing our work and life" and strive heartily to achieve it. Like many things it is a daily challenge, but like the seasons it has cycles.

I joke that I grew up in transition between Betty Friedan and Betty Crocker (OK, giving my age away!). I also heard from the media the line "you can have it all." And, as with most things in the media, or so I have found, that is not quite a true statement! Trying to have it all creates undue stress, frustration and discontent -- there has to be a balance.

Life, like the seasons, is about change. Change is a constant in our lives and can be stressful. Change is also part of a self-renewal cycle. Remember some stress is good. Without some level of stress we would be immobile -- we would not move forward, we would simply stand still. A certain level of stress propels us forward and serves as a motivating factor (think of company coming for Thanksgiving and the need to grocery shop, cook, and clean house!). Too much stress creates a condition called "distress" that is physically, emotionally and psychologically harmful. It too can create immobility.

Do you know people who seem to remain energized, excited and fully engaged in their careers and personal lives? Do you know people who seem to be discontent with their lot in life? Perhaps their reactions to the ongoing change that is part of life results from the skills they have developed (or not developed) to cope with cycles of change all of us go through.

Frederick Hudson, a well-respected expert in adult change, talks about life skills for managing change. He has spent a lifetime studying and understanding the ways that people get "off-track" from their inner purpose and how this leads to imbalance. His approach to managing change is based on the premise that people today must manage immense amounts of ongoing change in all aspects of their lives. We live in a world where unpredictable change infiltrates our daily lives, and we need to understand how to live and work creatively in a world that has less predictability and overall safety than the world we once knew.

To cope with change we have to be able to renew ourselves. This involves recognizing what it means to be self-renewing (what does it look like), understanding the phases of the renewal cycle, and developing skills to work through the phases.

Hudson's research reveals that self-renewing adults:

• are value-driven
• are connected to the world around them
• require solitude and quiet
• pace themselves
• enjoy contact with nature
• value creativity and playfulness
• adapt to change and pursue best options
• learn from down times
• keep learning new things
• are future-oriented

I encourage you to find that balance in the coming weeks. I think you'll find that making one positive choice, like learning something new, taking a walk and watching the leaves change color, or simply spending some time re-evaluating goals and dreams will lead to a greater sense of renewal. In my next article, we will look more closely at how we can move through the phases of change and life transition with a positive sense of renewal.

Happy Renewing!